19th August 2005

"You, yourself, as much as anybody in the entire universe,
deserve your love and affection."
-Buddha

Good morning!
Sigh...Yupz feeling gloomy. Woke up to an intimate dream wif my ex.. Had to fight my way to wake up! Sigh.. Must be da result of uploading pics to frenster i suppose. Stumbled on some files abt my past. Opened it n *BANG* emotions set astirred. I've always believe in an honest relationship, which is why i msg boo just now. But is best dat i blog it down. If she wishes never to know, den i hope she be upfront wif me. Den i just keep it a secret.. Abt wat ever dat might hurt her i mean..

Actually da most worrysome thing right now is my MOM! Sigh.. She's ill. Something abt her stomach. Last nite, she bled instead of her normal bowel. Took her to de doc.. He said it was "wind" but..sigh..It aint convincing enough! She's still lying down. I'm like soo worried.. My intuition is telling smtg but i just dun wanna listen! I hate it when my intuition is RIGHT!!!
I'm so scared n so worried.

I dun feel like meeting anyone.. Not even Boo! At dis pt of time, i cant stop thinking abt my ex. Perhaps she was once a part of my family. I dun think so i'll be goin to lil Sue's performance! So sorry sis.. I'm like feeling messed up now..

Boo's been very patience wif me..Even at times i haf trouble expressing myself..Thanz..